Editors note:   A Spanish-only speaker wrote MCDC asking for help in going out enfemme, but needed help with makeup and putting herself together, plus someone to go out with. She had wanted to do this for quite some time (years), and had several let downs until she contacted MCDC and the letter was forwarded to Marybeth       After Diane requested that I contact Lucinda, I contacted her and in the next few days we had three different telephone conversations. She transmitted a sense of sincerity and need to do what we at MCDC have the opportunity to do at every meeting – dress as a female. What started to build trust between us was the commonality that we discovered and the openness that started to develop. Initially, Lucinda wanted to make sure that I knew she was straight, though she has no problems with the gay and lesbian life-style. Her desire was to dress enfemme, go out in public, and savor that moment! Lucinda was frustrated at attempts to fulfill her desires

      Working out the logistics was not as hard as I thought it might have been, especially since we had limited time.She had been trying to find someone who would guide her in her quest for over a year. Disappointment and anger resulted from broken promises from a Spanish language radio station located in Dallas. The late night program is entitled “Intimate Confessions”. Callers call in to discuss secrets, request for dates and so on. Lucinda was promised a connection to someone who would help realized her need. Nothing ever materialized for Lucinda. As a result, she wrote a 15 page letter admonishing the D.J. for building up her hopes and rather than causing happiness, caused anguish. Her anger and disappointment resulted in her throwing away her entire first wardrobe and accessories.

      The urgency was due to Lucinda’s wanting to return to her Mexican home at the end of May or the first part of June so she could be reunited with her family. In her efforts to find someone to help with the proper way to use makeup, etc., she contacted MCDC by mail, using the address that was listed in the Lambda telephone book. In a last ditch attempt before heading home, Lucinda wrote a letter to MCDC in Spanish in April of this year. Diane forwarded this letter to me via an email attachment. I translated this letter and returned it to Diane that same day. I contacted Lucinda within two weeks after she had written the letter.

      We decided to meet on Saturday, May 19 at a hotel in the Mid-cities. After several delays for her that day, we finally met at 7:00 that evening. Feeling confident and yet cautious, we approached our appointment with a positive attitude. We had to change our plans to enter the hotel since the only entry and exit was through the hotel lobby – neither side entrances nor exits at this Super 8!

      Well, “hells bells’ – there were hordes of people hanging around the entries. I, too, started to wonder if my appearance would be questionable, especially since I wore a pair of men’s trousers and shirt with my enfeme makeup, shoes, and hair! Surprisingly, I did not notice any funny looks my way.

      After 3 separate series of knocks, a cautious but prepared Lucinda answered the door and let us in.

      So what do strangers say in these circumstances?

      Introductions of course! “And the pleasure of finally meeting you!”  The order of business was Lucinda’s. We were there for her, not us. We took our cues and listened to a brief history.   After reassurances and describing our M.O. we all felt comfortable.  Marcela was to leave the room and move the car near one of the two lobby doors that might be closer to entry and exit. We would stay in the room and when were both were dressed, I would call her on the cell phone so that she could come and help Lucinda with makeup application. Lucinda had practiced comportment as a lady for over a year, observing female actresses in television shows. Since there was no privacy at her temporary residence, she had to be extremely discrete in everything!

      I took some extra Mary Kay samples and express finish nail polish, anticipating a need for different types of make up, nail polish and perfume. Though Lucinda had accessories, shoes and a new wardrobe, she needed skin tone foundation and T I M E. You know that it takes longer for us ladies to apply our makeup properly!

      Marcela assisted Lucinda with helpful blending hints, and make up placement, accessory choice and hair refinement. Lucinda looked wonderful but she was doubtful about her hair tresses. She had prepared herself in matters such as body hair removal, her stride in high heels, fingernail health, (I painted her finger nails with a metallic red fast dry polish), teeth, perfume, and looks.

      At 9:55 PM we left the Super 8 and headed for the Cinemaplex, hoping that we could buy tickets before the 10 – 10:30 shows started. On our way, we picked names for en femme and chose the name Lucinda.

      I was dressed in a red corduroy shift, Lucinda in a long black straight dress – with a nice slim body to match, and Marcela with a nice blazer and pants. Well dear girls, when we arrived at the theatre parking lot, we got out of the car but never moved three yards from it!

      Lucinda was full of fear, self-consciousness, zero confidence, and frozen! There were too many youths, young couples, and families. We decided to go where she would feel more comfortable. After all, this event was for her and fulfillment of her multi-year long desire.

      We drove to Cedar Springs in Dallas. Our first quest was parking. After that was accomplished, we simply set out to walk among the crowd of people. We decided to eat at Panda’s. Our waiter spoke Spanish and Lucinda had no problem ordering her meal. She bought our midnight dinners, which were excellent! The service by the waiters was great and they treated us very well.

      We got fortune cookies. Marcela’s fortune message had the most appropriate message: “It is time to help a friend in need”. My fortune cookie had two messages: “Try something new” and “You will be selected for a promotion because of your accomplishments”. Lucinda’s fortune cookie message read: “Adversity will determine your friends”.

      After leaving Panda’s, we went to JR’s club in a two-story building that reminded me of the lyric from Three Dog Night’s “Mama Told Me Not To Come”! There were plenty of beautiful people there, a small round stage upon which a male dancer wearing a Jock strap kind of apparel would dance for men or women and be rewarded with currency placed around his waist – I think!? It was fun to experience such atmosphere but also easy to leave it. After a walking a few more blocks, we decided to head back to the Super 8 since both of us had to work on Sunday. Lucinda had to be ready by 7:30 AM, and I had the luxury of having to be a work at noon on Sunday (though it already was Sunday!).

      So how does one end such an evening? Very, very, difficult! We escorted Lucinda back to her room. We had already exchanged home addresses during dinner, discussed MCDC, and the possibility of staying in town for the MCDC June meeting. Marcela and I packed our makeup cases, garment bag, and other things that we brought, and headed back to Fort Worth from the Mid-Cities.

      Now what was the commonality that was discovered?

      During the evening, Lucinda told me where she grew-up. It was the same small town in Mexico where Marcela comes from! Lucinda simply could not believe it and due to fear of “outing”, told me not to tell Marcela. She later confessed that she thought I had somehow investigated her and found out a lot of information about her. However, upon meeting us in person, and relating some history, Lucinda mentioned the town that she called home. Marcela quickly picked up on that and was eager to find out if it was the same town where her parents and other family are located. It was affirmative!

      Such a reward for both Marcela and Lucinda in this small world! I thought that the evening would be spent talking and we would never leave Super 8! Needless to say, more trust and confidence filled the room.

      Let me share with you an old Chinese proverb that I heard on the OASIS radio station earlier this week. It’s rather apropos considering this past weekend’s celebration:

      If you want to be happy for a month – get married. If you want to be happy for life – help someone!”

      This incident is just one example of MCDC’s outreach efforts. Each and every one of us can make a difference in someone’s life.

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